Today I was told to write about the word “home.” My first thought was, “well, that is where the heart is.” But clichés aside I want to really think this through a little bit, so if you are reading I am going to give you my unfiltered and unedited thoughts this word evokes in my head.
There are probably as many varieties on what this word means as there are hair styles in the world. For some a home brings vivid thoughts racing through the mind. It is a place of stability and has been in the family for years. For some there is only one place they have ever called home while for others there have been so many variations of where home is and what it looks like that they really have no emotional attachment to any structure or building. There are some cases, like mine, where I have had two “homes” at a time for about as long as I can remember.
What makes a home a home? Is it simply a warm place to stay? Is it defined by the people who welcome you in when you arrive? Is it a place where memories are made?
I lived in a home with a couple of guys my last year of college. We were very intentional about calling it a home and not a house, because a house is just a building where people would come and go as they pleased, but a home was a sacred place; a home is where people could find rest and comfort; a home was where memories were made. As silly as that might sound we really did live by that. It was an odd arrangement. We were three guys who didn’t know each other well, but we all had a drive for hospitality in our own unique ways (and we had 6 bedrooms, so that made our house the place to be to stay the night). But we had the best mix of people come through. We had loud friends who would dance on the tables and we had the most reserved of people come in who would sit on our couches without saying more than necessary for it not to be awkward (which it was hard to make an awkward moment in our home). Our doors were never closed to anyone. Did that drive us crazy at times? Yes. But did we bond through it? You bet we did. There were so many personalities present that there were bound to be some doors slammed and some feelings hurt from time to time, but the mission of the home was so uniting that we didn’t have to get along at every moment in order to know that we were there with the same purpose.
It seems like a fairly good picture of what the church should look like. It is a group of people who welcome in all kinds of strange personalities. It is a place where people can find rest, hope, and love. And best of all it is a place where memories are made. Whenever there are people involved there are going to be hurt feelings and the proverbial or literal door slammed, however the church as described throughout the New Testament should be and will be a place where you would be able to find all the things present in a good home. Sometimes we just need to be reminded of our unifying mission and allow that to restore relationships that have been damaged, because there is something bigger we are living for rather than personal pride.
Thursday, July 17, 2014
Wednesday, July 16, 2014
Day 7
One thing I have enjoyed since I was a little kid is taking pictures. I always loved landscape photography and would constantly be looking for that perfect shot. I think a lot of this desire to capture the perfect picture drove me to love traveling. Whenever I would see a magazine like National Geographic or Time or any sort of traveling magazine with incredible shots I would instantly want to travel to the place just so I could try and capture the same picture or even one-up the picture I saw. Back in the days when you had to load real film in the back of a camera it made it very difficult to hone this skill. In fact, I would often frustrate my mom who would be the one buying the film because I would experiment by trying to get a good angle on something and missing the mark therefore wasting a roll of film.
The digital world did help with this, as it simplified the editing and deleting process wasting no resource outside of a few seconds of time. When I got my own digital camera I went to town. My old computer is loaded with all kinds of pictures that I took, of which I still look at from time to time to get a good laugh. I remember a trip I went on with my friends from high school the summer after we graduated and while everyone was talking and entertaining themselves in the car on the way down I was taking pictures out the window of the beautiful Virginia mountains with the sun peaking between crests. In almost all of my travels I take more pictures of inanimate objects and landscapes than I do of the people I actually travel with.
There are photographers that I am envious of. Those photographers who really know how to capture the emotion of a moment. I think it is absolutely brilliant what some people are able to do with a camera. But what I have found is that it is actually impossible to literally capture a moment. This is a hard reality because there are moments that we share with people where we wish time would just stand still or that we could go back to those times and relive exactly what we felt at those very special moments. Chances are as you are reading this you have some moments flooding to your head without any prompting.
As I was writing this I didn’t know exactly where it was going, but I started to realize how much I can tend to live in the past and dwell on moments that have already happened. I go in waves of doing this, but I think the thing that God is trying to tell me is that I need to trust that there will be more moments. I don’t know what they will look like, but I won’t ever know as long as I am dwelling on the past. Obviously that is way easier said than done and there are still moments that I will hold on to and cherish all my life and that isn’t a bad thing. But I don’t want that to keep me from living in the present and making moments happen in the here and now.
The digital world did help with this, as it simplified the editing and deleting process wasting no resource outside of a few seconds of time. When I got my own digital camera I went to town. My old computer is loaded with all kinds of pictures that I took, of which I still look at from time to time to get a good laugh. I remember a trip I went on with my friends from high school the summer after we graduated and while everyone was talking and entertaining themselves in the car on the way down I was taking pictures out the window of the beautiful Virginia mountains with the sun peaking between crests. In almost all of my travels I take more pictures of inanimate objects and landscapes than I do of the people I actually travel with.
There are photographers that I am envious of. Those photographers who really know how to capture the emotion of a moment. I think it is absolutely brilliant what some people are able to do with a camera. But what I have found is that it is actually impossible to literally capture a moment. This is a hard reality because there are moments that we share with people where we wish time would just stand still or that we could go back to those times and relive exactly what we felt at those very special moments. Chances are as you are reading this you have some moments flooding to your head without any prompting.
As I was writing this I didn’t know exactly where it was going, but I started to realize how much I can tend to live in the past and dwell on moments that have already happened. I go in waves of doing this, but I think the thing that God is trying to tell me is that I need to trust that there will be more moments. I don’t know what they will look like, but I won’t ever know as long as I am dwelling on the past. Obviously that is way easier said than done and there are still moments that I will hold on to and cherish all my life and that isn’t a bad thing. But I don’t want that to keep me from living in the present and making moments happen in the here and now.
Tuesday, July 15, 2014
Day 5
Many people may not know, but one thing I enjoy is cooking. I haven’t always been good at it and I haven’t always enjoyed it but I found new comfort in it in the past three years or so. A big reason I didn’t like it for a long time was because there isn’t always a set formula to it. I was also the kind of guy who would not let any of his food touch because I wouldn’t want to commit the cardinal dinner sin. While there are still foods I won’t eat the list is nothing compared to the list I had as a child.
One thing I have learned is that there are (I have no idea where this sentence was going… that’s the problem of writing while watching a movie… no editing).
It turns out that there are always unique pairings of food that seemingly work. There are even foods that, by themselves aren’t that good, but paired with the right partner can make quite a delectable treat. I think there was a time when I genuinely believed that all combinations that work have been experienced already. Maybe this is a common thing, thinking that there isn’t anything new to experience in the world. It’s a sad reality in which to live. Some would completely agree and even use the words of Solomon to back it up when he said “there is nothing new under the sun.” But was he right? And to what extent should that be taken if it is true? Some say that there are no experiences you can possibly have that haven’t been had before.
But I’m not here to get too deep into the questions that surround Solomon. I’m interested in cooking tonight.
The beauty that I have found in cooking is the creativity and the experimenting with different things. Maybe it is true that there is nothing left to experience that hasn’t already been experienced, but if there is don’t tell me that when I get excited about something I just discovered. Because even if it has been discovered before it is brand new to me and I will get just as excited about it as the first person who ever found it. But I would have a hard time believing that all the possibilities in the world have been discovered. Where is the mystery and adventure in that? I don’t want to assume something is true that will suck the adventure and wonder out of life. I want to try new things. I want to experiment and find new ways of doing things that will bring me some joy. I want to go on an adventure. It is interesting that there are times when God invites people on adventures and starts by saying, “I am going to do a new thing through you.” Our God is a God of adventure and new experiences. He is a God who loves to blow our minds and show us things we would have never thought possible.
That is what we are all looking for. We don’t want the same old thing and a life of comfort. After all, we don’t really know what comfort is (see previous post). I’m looking for an adventure. And though I haven’t mentioned much about cooking at all, this is a lesson that I can see very clearly in the kitchen.
One thing I have learned is that there are (I have no idea where this sentence was going… that’s the problem of writing while watching a movie… no editing).
It turns out that there are always unique pairings of food that seemingly work. There are even foods that, by themselves aren’t that good, but paired with the right partner can make quite a delectable treat. I think there was a time when I genuinely believed that all combinations that work have been experienced already. Maybe this is a common thing, thinking that there isn’t anything new to experience in the world. It’s a sad reality in which to live. Some would completely agree and even use the words of Solomon to back it up when he said “there is nothing new under the sun.” But was he right? And to what extent should that be taken if it is true? Some say that there are no experiences you can possibly have that haven’t been had before.
But I’m not here to get too deep into the questions that surround Solomon. I’m interested in cooking tonight.
The beauty that I have found in cooking is the creativity and the experimenting with different things. Maybe it is true that there is nothing left to experience that hasn’t already been experienced, but if there is don’t tell me that when I get excited about something I just discovered. Because even if it has been discovered before it is brand new to me and I will get just as excited about it as the first person who ever found it. But I would have a hard time believing that all the possibilities in the world have been discovered. Where is the mystery and adventure in that? I don’t want to assume something is true that will suck the adventure and wonder out of life. I want to try new things. I want to experiment and find new ways of doing things that will bring me some joy. I want to go on an adventure. It is interesting that there are times when God invites people on adventures and starts by saying, “I am going to do a new thing through you.” Our God is a God of adventure and new experiences. He is a God who loves to blow our minds and show us things we would have never thought possible.
That is what we are all looking for. We don’t want the same old thing and a life of comfort. After all, we don’t really know what comfort is (see previous post). I’m looking for an adventure. And though I haven’t mentioned much about cooking at all, this is a lesson that I can see very clearly in the kitchen.
Sunday, July 13, 2014
Day 4 - The Familiar: Failure
“Certainty is not a natural human experience… but faith; is second only to error.”
Sometimes the thing that holds people back from doing what they know they are supposed to do or what they know they want to do is the fear of failure. I know this fear has been something that has held me back from many things I have really wanted in life. What is interesting is failure is something I am more acquainted with than anything else in the world. Yet so many times I have been gripped by fear of failure to the point of paralysis.
In a world where we strive so desperately for certainty the only thing that is certain is failure. I know that you might be thinking this is a very negative statement and possibly a depressing post, but it is actually meant to be a freeing post. When we release the idea that everything has to be perfect and according to plan and accept that we are probably going to fail and sometimes even fail hard then we realize that there is actually a grace that covers us when we do. It is almost as if we were never meant to be perfect and in control. That is the beauty of this exercise I am doing because it takes the fear of failure and being above average out of the picture. There have been many times I have been paralyzed by a blank page, but not anymore. At least not the past few days, because all I do is sit down and start writing about anything that is on my mind. Granted I missed a post only 3 days into the challenge, but the nice thing is the rules say if you miss a day you don’t make up for it you just keep going as if you never missed a beat. It is as if they knew this would be challenging and people would run out of things to write about and the fear of a blank page and the fear of not having anything to say and the fear of failure would paralyze people, so they went ahead and built grace into the whole package.
It seems similar to life in a lot of ways. There are people who concern themselves too much with living the wrong way and they never end up living at all. Jim Carrey recently gave a commencement speech at a university where he talked about our insatiable thirst for security. He told a story about how his dad could have been a great comedian, but there were too many uncertainties that surrounded it so he got a “safe” job as an accountant. He went on to say that when he (Jim) was about 10 years old his dad lost that safe job and his family had to do whatever they could to make ends meet. He wrapped the story up by a simple line that has been sometime I have held onto for a while now and that line is: “You can fail at what you don’t want to do; so you might as well take a chance at doing something you love.”
Sure, you are going to fail. But success isn’t defined by those who don’t fall, but by those who are able to fall and pick themselves up again as if nothing ever happened. Failure is probably the most familiar human experience, so let us embrace it and keep moving forward doing what we were born to do.
Sometimes the thing that holds people back from doing what they know they are supposed to do or what they know they want to do is the fear of failure. I know this fear has been something that has held me back from many things I have really wanted in life. What is interesting is failure is something I am more acquainted with than anything else in the world. Yet so many times I have been gripped by fear of failure to the point of paralysis.
In a world where we strive so desperately for certainty the only thing that is certain is failure. I know that you might be thinking this is a very negative statement and possibly a depressing post, but it is actually meant to be a freeing post. When we release the idea that everything has to be perfect and according to plan and accept that we are probably going to fail and sometimes even fail hard then we realize that there is actually a grace that covers us when we do. It is almost as if we were never meant to be perfect and in control. That is the beauty of this exercise I am doing because it takes the fear of failure and being above average out of the picture. There have been many times I have been paralyzed by a blank page, but not anymore. At least not the past few days, because all I do is sit down and start writing about anything that is on my mind. Granted I missed a post only 3 days into the challenge, but the nice thing is the rules say if you miss a day you don’t make up for it you just keep going as if you never missed a beat. It is as if they knew this would be challenging and people would run out of things to write about and the fear of a blank page and the fear of not having anything to say and the fear of failure would paralyze people, so they went ahead and built grace into the whole package.
It seems similar to life in a lot of ways. There are people who concern themselves too much with living the wrong way and they never end up living at all. Jim Carrey recently gave a commencement speech at a university where he talked about our insatiable thirst for security. He told a story about how his dad could have been a great comedian, but there were too many uncertainties that surrounded it so he got a “safe” job as an accountant. He went on to say that when he (Jim) was about 10 years old his dad lost that safe job and his family had to do whatever they could to make ends meet. He wrapped the story up by a simple line that has been sometime I have held onto for a while now and that line is: “You can fail at what you don’t want to do; so you might as well take a chance at doing something you love.”
Sure, you are going to fail. But success isn’t defined by those who don’t fall, but by those who are able to fall and pick themselves up again as if nothing ever happened. Failure is probably the most familiar human experience, so let us embrace it and keep moving forward doing what we were born to do.
Friday, July 11, 2014
Day 2
As I went to bed last night I thought to myself, “This 500 words thing is going to be fun.” By the time I woke up I was laying in my bed thinking, “Why did I do this? I have nothing left say!” And now I wish I didn’t start out by saying that, but the rules of engagement are very clear about no editing, so there is that.
I like to be someone who can simplify things for people in a way they are able to understand. I think it is very frustrating when you look at problem or a situation and see all these complex parts and you aren’t able to make sense of them. It can be quite paralyzing. I learned early in life that if you can break things into more manageable pieces then any task, no matter how complex, is achievable. One of the earliest examples of this I believe came from my grandma, who loves putting together puzzles. Not simple 15-20 piece puzzles, I mean massive 1,000 or more piece puzzles that take days and weeks to complete. The steps are simple and most people know how they would go about putting together that big of a puzzle, they just wouldn’t take the time to do it. But if you wanted to, the next step after dumping out the thousand pieces would be to separate them by edge pieces and middle pieces. Next you would probably sort them into color groupings and then you would find your corner pieces and start building your frame. Some of you might be thinking, “I would never start a puzzle in such a way.” Well, my grandma would so write your own blog about how to put a puzzle together! (Booya)
The point is, it is simple when you know the process. It doesn’t mean that each step of the process won’t take time, but as long as you know what the process is then you are able to complete the task if you give it time.
Sometimes we tend to take something that has a very clearly defined process and we muddy it up and make it way more complex than it needs to be. We start allowing all these other influences that may or may not know what they are talking about get us trying things and we don’t understand how they fit within our process that already works. When we allow that to happen it is extremely easy to get side-tracked and allow things to become complex once again.
This is leadership to me. What was once a very simple process became very muddy for me because I allowed different philosophies and structures to influence me without understanding how they fit into the process I already had established that was working. Lately I have been thinking of a time when I knew much less than I do now, but felt like I might have been a more productive leader. I find that very ironic that the more I knew the less effective I was becoming. What I am not saying is “education is pointless” in fact, I believe the opposite is true. What I am saying is that it is important to find a structure that works and stick with it and allow the new education to work within that structure. That is the piece I missed and so I allowed a lot of things jack with the structure I had in place. Leadership is actually quite simple. My philosophy is: leadership is influence. Relationships allow for trust and trust allows for influence. If you have influence, you are a leader.
I believe it is actually that simple. Let’s no longer complicate something that doesn’t need to be complicated.
I like to be someone who can simplify things for people in a way they are able to understand. I think it is very frustrating when you look at problem or a situation and see all these complex parts and you aren’t able to make sense of them. It can be quite paralyzing. I learned early in life that if you can break things into more manageable pieces then any task, no matter how complex, is achievable. One of the earliest examples of this I believe came from my grandma, who loves putting together puzzles. Not simple 15-20 piece puzzles, I mean massive 1,000 or more piece puzzles that take days and weeks to complete. The steps are simple and most people know how they would go about putting together that big of a puzzle, they just wouldn’t take the time to do it. But if you wanted to, the next step after dumping out the thousand pieces would be to separate them by edge pieces and middle pieces. Next you would probably sort them into color groupings and then you would find your corner pieces and start building your frame. Some of you might be thinking, “I would never start a puzzle in such a way.” Well, my grandma would so write your own blog about how to put a puzzle together! (Booya)
The point is, it is simple when you know the process. It doesn’t mean that each step of the process won’t take time, but as long as you know what the process is then you are able to complete the task if you give it time.
Sometimes we tend to take something that has a very clearly defined process and we muddy it up and make it way more complex than it needs to be. We start allowing all these other influences that may or may not know what they are talking about get us trying things and we don’t understand how they fit within our process that already works. When we allow that to happen it is extremely easy to get side-tracked and allow things to become complex once again.
This is leadership to me. What was once a very simple process became very muddy for me because I allowed different philosophies and structures to influence me without understanding how they fit into the process I already had established that was working. Lately I have been thinking of a time when I knew much less than I do now, but felt like I might have been a more productive leader. I find that very ironic that the more I knew the less effective I was becoming. What I am not saying is “education is pointless” in fact, I believe the opposite is true. What I am saying is that it is important to find a structure that works and stick with it and allow the new education to work within that structure. That is the piece I missed and so I allowed a lot of things jack with the structure I had in place. Leadership is actually quite simple. My philosophy is: leadership is influence. Relationships allow for trust and trust allows for influence. If you have influence, you are a leader.
I believe it is actually that simple. Let’s no longer complicate something that doesn’t need to be complicated.
Thursday, July 10, 2014
500 Word Challenge
I have felt for a long time that I have an undeveloped gift of writing. Many times I have set goals to write a particular number of blogs in a year and have fallen well short each time such a goal has been set. There is something vulnerable about putting your personal thoughts out for the world to see. Every time a blog is posted it is a breeding ground for insecurity and doubts. “Will anyone appreciate what I have to say?” “Is what I have to say a waste of time for readers?” “What will people think about the parts of me that I share here that I haven’t shared with anyone else?”
Vulnerability is a word that gets tossed around a lot when talking about writing and it is true, there is a vulnerability that goes along with putting your thoughts out for the world to see. It was pointed out to me recently that even people you completely trust, if you are vulnerable with them, that just means they know how to hurt you more than anyone else. If you think about how many people actually know you—your fears, your struggles, the things that bring you joy, the areas of success you wish you had, etc.—you might be able to only count those people on one hand. I know I am not in need of a second hand when counting those people.
Because of the vulnerability that comes with writing I have not posted a blog in months. In fact, this is probably the longest I have gone without posting a blog since I created my blog in 2008. This doesn’t mean that I haven’t written anything in the last 7 months, it just means that I haven’t written anything that I had enough confidence in to post it for the world to see. There are a number of labels you can put that under (whether fear, insecurity, laziness, or others), but I realize that I have been a little selfish with my thoughts in general. Until recently I would remain as silent as possible in meetings, only offering my words when requested. But I have realized that I have been selfish. I have realized that maybe thoughts come to me and words pair together in my head in such a way that are meant to be viewed by others.
So here is the remedy: I have accepted a 500 word challenge. The 500 word challenge is that every day for 31 days I must get up and write 500 words and without editing I must post it. So for the next 31 days you will be getting unfiltered thoughts on paper from the mind of Jordan Curtis. By no means do I expect everyone to read all of my thoughts, but any kind of feedback is welcome. I want to know what kinds of things resonate with you and what things you could do without hearing. So here it is: my first 500 words.
Vulnerability is a word that gets tossed around a lot when talking about writing and it is true, there is a vulnerability that goes along with putting your thoughts out for the world to see. It was pointed out to me recently that even people you completely trust, if you are vulnerable with them, that just means they know how to hurt you more than anyone else. If you think about how many people actually know you—your fears, your struggles, the things that bring you joy, the areas of success you wish you had, etc.—you might be able to only count those people on one hand. I know I am not in need of a second hand when counting those people.
Because of the vulnerability that comes with writing I have not posted a blog in months. In fact, this is probably the longest I have gone without posting a blog since I created my blog in 2008. This doesn’t mean that I haven’t written anything in the last 7 months, it just means that I haven’t written anything that I had enough confidence in to post it for the world to see. There are a number of labels you can put that under (whether fear, insecurity, laziness, or others), but I realize that I have been a little selfish with my thoughts in general. Until recently I would remain as silent as possible in meetings, only offering my words when requested. But I have realized that I have been selfish. I have realized that maybe thoughts come to me and words pair together in my head in such a way that are meant to be viewed by others.
So here is the remedy: I have accepted a 500 word challenge. The 500 word challenge is that every day for 31 days I must get up and write 500 words and without editing I must post it. So for the next 31 days you will be getting unfiltered thoughts on paper from the mind of Jordan Curtis. By no means do I expect everyone to read all of my thoughts, but any kind of feedback is welcome. I want to know what kinds of things resonate with you and what things you could do without hearing. So here it is: my first 500 words.
Wednesday, December 18, 2013
24
Another year has come and gone. Here are some reflections on the past year and some things that I have learned.
This last year has been such a profound one in my life. As I look back on it I can see how much I have changed and hopefully matured, as well as areas that I still need to grow and develop.
Year 23 taught me to be bold and make tough decisions. It has taught me that I cannot please everyone, so I don’t need to try. It has taught me that I will only be as close to God as I want to be and whenever I call on His name He hears me.
23 has taught me that if I am actually committed to doing something and I have the right people supporting me in it that I can do anything I want to.
23 has shown me that God answers prayers. He has given me some of the best friends I could possibly ask for. Friends who are full of grace and truth, who love me in spite of my faults, who pick me up when I am down, and who give me a place to rest.
23 has taught me that when I am being who I was created to be I am the most effective for the Kingdom. I am not the typical personality for someone in my position, but as long as I try to be the typical I am robbing the kingdom of someone God placed in it. I believe now that God has uniquely equipped me to meet needs in His Kingdom that others may or may not be equipped to meet and I should acknowledge that and be comfortable in that.
23 has taught me that love has many faces and many forms.
23 has taught me to laugh in new ways. To laugh at myself. To laugh with others. To laugh when I am alone. And to laugh for no reason at all. It is quite enjoyable to see how many different ways you can laugh and even more enjoyable to see how many people you can freak out when you laugh in unexpected times.
23 has challenged nearly everything I believe and has made what I believe my own.
23 has been a hard year.
23 has been a wonderful year.
23 has come and gone. Now on to 24: a new year with fresh adventures and new challenges. A year with joys I can’t yet fathom and moments that might bring me to tears. My goals for the next year are to simply: keep moving forward; don’t dwell on what I don’t have but look forward to what is coming; stretch myself; be proactive; and remember that The Lord is my shepherd and I lack nothing.
Here’s to 24, may it be a very good year.
This last year has been such a profound one in my life. As I look back on it I can see how much I have changed and hopefully matured, as well as areas that I still need to grow and develop.
Year 23 taught me to be bold and make tough decisions. It has taught me that I cannot please everyone, so I don’t need to try. It has taught me that I will only be as close to God as I want to be and whenever I call on His name He hears me.
23 has taught me that if I am actually committed to doing something and I have the right people supporting me in it that I can do anything I want to.
23 has shown me that God answers prayers. He has given me some of the best friends I could possibly ask for. Friends who are full of grace and truth, who love me in spite of my faults, who pick me up when I am down, and who give me a place to rest.
23 has taught me that when I am being who I was created to be I am the most effective for the Kingdom. I am not the typical personality for someone in my position, but as long as I try to be the typical I am robbing the kingdom of someone God placed in it. I believe now that God has uniquely equipped me to meet needs in His Kingdom that others may or may not be equipped to meet and I should acknowledge that and be comfortable in that.
23 has taught me that love has many faces and many forms.
23 has taught me to laugh in new ways. To laugh at myself. To laugh with others. To laugh when I am alone. And to laugh for no reason at all. It is quite enjoyable to see how many different ways you can laugh and even more enjoyable to see how many people you can freak out when you laugh in unexpected times.
23 has challenged nearly everything I believe and has made what I believe my own.
23 has been a hard year.
23 has been a wonderful year.
23 has come and gone. Now on to 24: a new year with fresh adventures and new challenges. A year with joys I can’t yet fathom and moments that might bring me to tears. My goals for the next year are to simply: keep moving forward; don’t dwell on what I don’t have but look forward to what is coming; stretch myself; be proactive; and remember that The Lord is my shepherd and I lack nothing.
Here’s to 24, may it be a very good year.
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